Hello Blogspot,

I'm sorry that I haven't been on. I've just got some things going on. :3

I hope and wish my mother to get well soon. I'm too scared to lose her. I sat constantly beside her wishing that she'd be better.. Please God, don't take her away from us. Not right now.

My aunt called and i'm ready to move down south with her this december, but I told her politely that I'd rather just stay here with my mom until things get better. (:

.... ugh. I can't stop being moody. I hate it. :'(

What's on my mind:

I'm just happy that Abbey's wedding was a huge success and I'm hoping the photographers have most of the pictures developed so I can finally add them onto facebook, too! It was a very hectic day for me. I loved it. I can't to have my own wedding someday.

Also, I can't believe he wrote a 4 page essay about his feelings for me. I'm utterly in disbelief that he'd do that. But as sweet and adorable this was, I must refuse his proposal for now. I'm very sorry. :(

I'm not ready to be in a very good commitment. I'm only 17 and counting. I'm still a growing adult, and something that committed will jepordize my school and work. No, it's not an excuse. Actually a friend of mine helped me out of it, and I am so grateful that he talked me to it. I'm just not prepared to be that commited to someone. I have my own dreams to accomplish and you have yours. May be in a few years, some day.. we'll give ourselves a try and maybe by then.

...I haven't given up on love, I believe in it. no matter what kind of relationship it is, I will never stop believing. but right now, i'm just not ready.

Also, I'll be flying to Milan next, next week. or even sooner. just waiting for my manager to give the final call and I'll be on my way. Summer is very stressful. :) please, god. watch over my loved ones.

Happily Ever After..

I'm always fascinated with fairy tales and the great stories of princess being swooped off by their princes. You could say I fantasize about my own dreams. :3 I am so exited to have my cousin, Abbey to finally be tied to the man who she's been happily in love with since middle school. Yes! Middle School! :P it's so weiiiirrrdd bu I'm so happy for them. I know Mike's going to take good care of Abbey! :)

Things I need to do:

-Work out! (MUST)
-Book hotels for Mom and Pop
-Take care of laundry and dogs
-Ask for appointment with Chi
-Appointment with Abbey
-BUY STARBUCKS!~ <3 BUSY BUSY! :3

I am so excited! :3 I feel like I'm the one who's getting married! Teehee. I know the list is a wee bit small, but if I were to be married, I know that I'll have more things to do (even to the tiniest detail. :3) it's a Stevenson woman deal. :3 I hope my husband doesn't mind me becoming a bridezilla! D:

Decisions

I just need to get off something out. (:

1. Work- I'm currently going to be back in the States next week. Visit my Aunt and then fly back to Maryland to visit Mom and Pop. :3


2. Food- French cuisine is ah-mazing~ <3 :3


3. Travel- I'll be going back to the States next week, and I'm excited!

Places I'm going to visit soon:

• Milan


• Hungary


• Germany


• Switzerland


• Sweden


• Spain


• Portugal

It's going to be hectic this summer break. I'm excited! I want to make the best of it~ <3

Also, apparently... [insert name] has changed their mind. I'm very disgusted the fact that they are going to change just because of THAT. Eugh. Also, [insert their ugly names] what an ugly couple. She's very clingy and annoying. From what I hear, she's fake. That's not who he's supposed to be with. :) js.

But what can we do? Personally me? None. Just let them be happy. :3

Strangers

strangers.

when meeting someone for the first time in your life, you first start off as strangers. but do you know what it’s like to meet someone for the first time and then actually falling in love with them? once you see him/her you start to think, “wow, this one looks like the one for me.” after awhile, you guys start to talk and talk, and just get used to each other. well, let’s just say, it can be a good thing getting used to each other, but also bad. you might be asking, how is it bad? well, after being really used to each other, someone might start losing feeling in that relationship. after awhile, everything will turn into big arguments. big arguments can lead to very serious break-ups. you don’t know when or how it’s going to happen. but you know why it’s happening. after breaking-up, you start checking on them again and see that they have a new person in their life. you might see on facebook that they probably changed their relationship status from “single” into a “relationship” again… after a month or so later, you see them again and it just feels so weird. have you ever gotten that feeling where after awhile you see your “ex” and then you startfalling for them again? that’s what i mean by weird. but once you see them, you see them with someone else, but you can’t do anything about it. deep down inside, you really want to scream or cry probably, maybe even hurt the new person that he/she is in a relationship with but you don’t want to look like afool, so you just smile and pretend that everything is okay. remember the lovewe once had? everything is gone, and now… we’re just strangers again… i guess it really is time to move on.

Story of my life. :3 I'm confused as ever.

A story..

Not your typical love story.. Guy meets Girl, they fell in love, then out of it. blah blah blah <3

I told you. I took a picture. :)

It's overlooking the river. What are the chances of you coming to France and watching this.

This is the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for someone. :3 I'm jealous.

laying in bed, doing nothing. :l This is the life. :3

I can't believe that he'd do such a thing! :D

Dear Bitch,

Hey you. I think you really should stop hoping for the good things in life. You're a slut after all, right? No one knows you and that you're incredibly annoying and incredibly wrong about everything.

Don't make him fall in love with you. You're not the right one for anyone. :)

best regards to you,

Meghan. :3

Break time

It's a pretty much mid-afternoon. Work schedule is hectic! I'm very excited! I need to go and lie down already ugh. I'm waiting for the girls to prepare. This dress is killing me, and I'm tired of wearing frilly dresses! Jeans and loose shirts are better, right? :) Let's talk about something nice for a change:

• France- Such an amazing place to go. The people are snobby but overall the place is fantastic


• Relationships- Happily hoping that we'll work out. :)

Speaking of him. He's sweet. I like him. :) I hope he's the one.

mm..I'm craving for some pizza! <3

Work time!

Why is he being so foolish with this person? I don't understand. He's pretty much the first guy who's proved me wrong. He's sweet and caring... She's really lucky.

N/A

As I lie here and sipping my cup of tea. I smile at how wonderful my life is. The view from outside is remarkable. One of the most beautiful structures of the world is outside, and it's very clear to see..

In the end, I'll have to give this away and be with someone I truly love. :) Let's make the best of this.

Opportunity

I'm so excited! Business flight to Europe is amazing. It's very luxiourious. I'm very happy...

:)

He's right. I should move on and be happy with him.

Conflicts

Nurturing a relationship is vital if you want to stay together. Bitterness, irritation and constant stress between two people not only affects their personal mindset but also the people around. Learn to resolve fights and arguments by saying “Sorry.” But many find it hard to say this. It is important to understand that if you are wrong, admitting your mistake is the right thing to do. An argument doesn’t need a winner or a loser.

When in an argument, avoid bringing up the past as it will add more hostility. It is best to remain calm and above all forgive and forget. If you have to disagree then do it devotedly. There will be many occasions when you and your partner will not see things eye to eye. Learn to accept people as they are and adjust whole-heartedly.

Learn to be persistent in showing that both of you like each other and want to better your relationship at every stage of your life. This will create harmony and balance in your lives for years together.

I'm confused..

I'm so troubled. I don't know what to do! :/

Overthinking is overated, and I can't stand the fact that I'm hurting this other guy by keeping promises. He's such a sweet person and I feel like he's the right person though, I'm scared.

James wants me back. I don't know I can handle this..

Promise.

What promise can you make me?

Valentines

The primary motive behind Valentines is MONEY. And plenty of it! Hallmark is cleverly cashing in on the sales of Valentines Day greeting cards. The same with people who sell flowers, Candy and cute cuddly bears. They all do this under the guise of something called Love.
They do this while making single people feel sad, degrading them. Society forces you to feel inadequate and less of a person because you are not involved in a "RELATIONSHIP". They alienate you because you choose to be celibate. They ostracize you because you are content with a romantic less relationship. They surround you with sickening displays of kissing, cupids, hearts, and public displays of affection until it forces you to puke!

Valentines has a bad effect on the general population of the human race. For example, instead of pleasantly surprising someone you care. People now expect gifts to be exchanged in a Valentine’s ritual. Giving gifts to make someone feel special should have personal motives (motives of honestly trying to make that person feel good) NOT a ritual because society and people around you EXPECT it.

When it comes down to it Valentines is a overrated capitalistic invention by Hallmark to make money with sick side affects of lowering self-esteem of many individuals

You

They say there is a window from one heart to another
How can there be a window where no wall remains?"
-Rumi


The importance of the look. That's how all of this started. When we sat together, alone, for the first time, and a curtain rose up quickly: "now is the time; it's finally your show". The reasons that your heart aches. The ways in which I let go of mine. Why did you tell me things that are reserved only for the most trustworthy, to the ones closest to your heart and mind? Why did I tell you mine?

The look. There we were in a group of our friends, laughing at something because everyone else was, listening and nodding, but there you were, for those few seconds, returning the same eyes back at me: studying something fervently, with the cool and calmness as if nothing is out of the ordinary. But here's the thing: things already started slowly crumbling, strikingly. Something about you was out of the ordinary.

A feeling of knowing, marked with the desire to discover the unknown. You. Layer by layer, exposing the insides, the beautiful insides of you.

I shiver when we sit on the bench. My smoke is my breath's particles freezing in the frigid cold. Yours is from another cigarette. Are there stars out tonight? Can we see them? Where is it that we are, because I only seem to remember your face. I let my knee rest on your leg, the warmth of the small interaction soothes me; the same way you warm me with your smile, touch, kiss, laughter, words, look, you.

You breathe into my arm, up and down, each finger one by one, trying to catch and remember my scent when I lie next to you. When you leave I search the depths of my pillow and sheets to see if there are any remaining traces of you. Some things stay with me even after the sheets are washed.


Time makes no sense in all of this; that is, the way it passes. Has it been five hours already? But I have so much more to tell you. I want to listen to you for days, a break to soak it all in, then repeat.

An open book, you are. No suspicions or questions, you are simply laid out for me. I read each word of you carefully, surprised at my complete understanding. Do you know a synonym for 'us'? It's patience. I want to find the most felicitous sentences to show you that my overflow of impulses to grab and then grasp you, not just you but what's inside of you, has one purpose: you, you, you. Sometimes I'm at a loss for words, they don't come as quickly, as perfectly, as I'd like. So I take your hands in mine and with honest eyes tell you one thing: please, hold on.

There are plenty of birds in the sky, I know; but you, but you, you're my favorite one.

- Magdelena Viktoria.

I love you

"I love you" he says to her.

She looks at him for a moment. She knows where this is going and her thoughts knew.
His intentions are the same. Love? It's so cliche.

The difference

A lot of change. I'm worried.